I learned a lot during my four years of college, probably more than I've collectively learned prior to becoming an undergrad. Obviously a great deal of this knowledge was academic, but not exclusively so. I learned firsthand what it's like to procrastinate and think you have everything under control until the week before the exam (ohhhh...) and still come out on top with decent, even good grades. (Only thing is I can't tell you how that happened because I forgot it all after three consecutive all-nighters.) I learned how to overcome my introverted personality in leadership positions and how to stand up for myself in stressful situations.
But one thing I never learned was what to expect as a graduate. Sure, I had my expectations. Get a postgraduate degree. Find a job in media and publishing. Travel the world. Write. Write anything. And at Day 44 of Graduate Life, none of it has happened. Yet.
I say "yet" because it's only Day 44 and because Graduate Life has taught me that there's more to being a recent graduate than trying to accomplish your set goals, whatever they may be, in the shortest time possible. So this is what Graduate Life 101 has taught me these past several weeks:
1) Just because it hasn't happened yet doesn't mean it never will.
I'm not going to lie: I've spent a lot of nights staring at my bedroom ceiling wondering what the heck I'm going to do with my life and questioning all the decisions I made in college. Especially after my plans for grad school changed. I'm a person who feels most confident when my goals set in stone, and if there's any change to that it can shake my confidence. But I keep telling myself that a setback doesn't mean that it's permanent and even if it doesn't always feel convincing, it's a good reminder that things will get better.
2) Family can drive you crazy, but be glad you have them.
I'm currently writing this in the room I share with my seven year old sister (if that doesn't indicate my need for personal space I don't know what does). In uni, I could map my own schedule and have spontaneous nights out. Now, I have to brief my parents on where I'm going, who I'll be with and when I'll be back (lest I get kidnapped or...whatever their reasoning is). Family has always been the number one priority at my house and although it's not easy readjusting to my family's hectic schedule, at least I know they'll always be there for me.
3) Your first job may not be your dream job, but it can lead to different opportunities.
I'm working at a winery tasting room and I love it. It's a sweet job, even if it's not going to turn into a career. And even though I'm not using my writing skills, working at Ox Eye has been great for me as a writer. My boss is also a writer and gives me a lot of suggestions on lit journals, and during a slow shift last weekend she let me read a piece of her flash fiction and critique it (!).
4) College is a great time for spontaneity and adventure, but don't give it up after graduation.
I spent today with two of my best friends on a wine tasting tour in Charlottesville (which is especially fun if you work at a vineyard i.e. free tastings :) ) and ran into my adviser at a bookstore in the Downtown Mall. This weekend I'm going to DC to be with my boyfriend (!). A month from today my brother and I are going to see U2, and a few weeks after that we're going to a Brandon Flowers concert in Richmond with friends. Point is, my social calendar is just as busy as during my undergrad years and there's no reason it shouldn't be. I may be an actual adult, but I'm still going to make time for new experiences in my life.
(My favorite picture from this afternoon. 4.5) Wine will always be there for you. Enjoy it.)
5) Know who your true friends are, and they'll pull you through.
I thought this was important in college, but it's even more true as an alum. Despite all the positives of having graduated, being in the real world can really suck. And you're not going to be surrounded by the people at your university. You're going to lose touch with most of them, and that's okay. As long as you keep in touch with the people who you can call at 3 AM when it feels like your life is falling apart, everything will be okay. Think of them as an extension of your family because they are. I know I can talk to my sister and roommate about anything that's bothering me (and I'm not talking about the seven year old) and she knows she can do the same with me.
Anything I forgot for Graduate Life 101? Any suggestions? Comments welcome!
Cheers,
Victoria
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